Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
