Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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