Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
