Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Randomize
