Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(630): View more from Illinois

is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?

(815): View more from Illinois

that's gum

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(432): View more from Texas

From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention

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(619): View more from California

My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.

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(205): View more from Alabama

After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".

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(917): View more from New York City

He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.

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(850): View more from Florida

Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

I have poison ivy on my dick

(1-870): View more from Arkansas

WHAT

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(425): View more from Washington

I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.

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