I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
