I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
