I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
