Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
