Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
