IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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