did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize