why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
