the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
