On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
