i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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