Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
