Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I'm getting married
To pizza
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
