I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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