i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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