Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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