OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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