so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
