I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize