VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize