True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
