come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize
