Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
