I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Randomize
