i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
