today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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