Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
