dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
