Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
