Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
he was CRYING into my vagina
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Randomize
