at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
