Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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