i wish semen tasted like chocolate
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize