Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize