I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
