Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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