I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
