Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
