Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian

Fav 16 2155 2517
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(949): View more from California

Getting food. Want anything?

(1-949): View more from California

Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce

Fav 7 2394 976
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(310): View more from California

i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son

Fav 19 1143 4458
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(203): View more from Connecticut

he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?

Fav 162 2748 36901
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.

Fav 11 1175 3679
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(330): View more from Ohio

Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.

Fav 8 3479 1204
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(458): View more from Oregon

I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.

(350): View more from

You are my idol.

Fav 21 3712 1378
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(940): View more from Texas

Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.

Fav 2 1019 665
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(241): View more from

Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?

Fav 0 8 76
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