and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
