You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
