Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize