I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
