Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
