you win again, gameday.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize