that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize