this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize