Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
